The Plan
by RavenRosebud
Summary: Hagrid has a crush and a plan.


Title: The Plan

Author: RavenRosebud

Pairing: Snape/Hagrid

Rating:PG13

Summery: Hagrid has a crush, and a plan.

Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all his friends do not belong to me, the sick plot does though.

Feedback: Please for the love of all things unholy, yes!

Rubeus Hagrid, Keeper of Keys and Grounds at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry was no ordinary man. First off, he was a wizard, just not a very good one. He was also half-giant and half-man. The most peculiar thing about him though was his love of all things unlovable.

Hagrid had a love for flobber worms, three headed dogs (named Fluffy of all things), dragons, and the greasy haired git himself, Professor Severus Snape. This last one was his closest guarded secret. Professor Snape was not a kind man, and Hagrid did not know how he would react to this information.

On the third anniversary of the day he realized his feelings for Snape were of the romantic sort, Hagrid came up with a plan. He couldn't stand by and let people treat the Professor with such little respect, the man needed to know that someone cared for him.

On the first day of Operation Seduce Severus, Hagrid made sure he was sitting next to him at breakfast. He paid careful attention to Severus's favorite foods making notes on his small leather bound notepad.

Professor Snape, of course, couldn't help but notice this odd behavior but decided to simply ignore the odd man.

On the second day, Hagrid once again sat next to Snape at breakfast and made sure that his favorite foods were out of reach so he would have to ask Hagrid for them. Snape ate dry toast instead.

On the third day of the operation Hagrid decided to attempt a conversation.

"Morning, Professor, sir." Snape glared at him. "How's classes going?"

"They are all complete dunderheads, I don't know why I bother." Snape stood, his robes billowing out behind him and left the Great Hall. Hagrid sat staring at the seat the professor had just vacated.

Now the fourth day, he made some progress, sort of. During his afternoon walk Hagrid took a shortcut through the Forbidden Forest. He was going over his lesson plans for his Care of Magical Creatures class and was not watching where he was going. A sharp pain in his ankle caused him to look down just in time to see the culprit, a small coral snake slither away from him.

This was perfect. Now he needed the help of the school's potions master, Professor Snape. Hagrid clumsily ran to the castle in search of the man.

"Professor Snape, sir. I need a potion."

Snape glanced up from the potion he was currently working on as the behemoth of a man came barreling into his office. "May I help you?"

"I was bit by a snake, sir."

Professor Snape walked over to his cupboard and started moving bottle around. "Type of snake?"

"Coral." Snape looked over at him for a moment before continuing rummaging through his potions.

He pulled out a small glass bottle that contained an orange liquid that appeared to be glowing. "Drink this." Hagrid sighed as his fingers brushed against the long stained fingers of the man he loved. Snape arched a brow and turned his back on him.

Hagrid causally placed the empty bottle in his pocket. "Thank you sir."

Snape did not acknowledge him as he went back to what he had been working on before the interruption.

Hagrid paced the floor of his hut. Snape had touched him today, well technically he had touched Snape. A plan started forming in his head. Today's incident could definitely work to his advantage.

Two days later found Hagrid standing outside of Professor Snape's private quarters. In his right hand he held a very expensive, very large bottle of scotch. He cleared his throat, wiped off his left hand on his leg, and knocked.

"Enter." Hagrid's hand shook slightly as he opened the large wooden door. "Hagrid?"

Snape was surprised of course. The only one who visited him in his private quarters was Dumbledore, which is who he had expected to enter his room.

"Evening, Professor. I brought you some scotch."

The famous brow went up as Snape took in the scene before him. "Why?"

"I just wanted to say thank you, for the other day."

Snape continued looking at him. "Er...do you have glasses sir?" Snape scowled then turned and left the room.

Hagrid was still standing in the same spot when Snape reentered carrying two tumblers. Snape took the bottle and poured some into each glass.

"To you Professor Snape." Hagrid raised his glass to the man and watched over the rim as Snape sniffed and then drank his scotch.

They ended up on the sofa sitting next to one another as they drank. Once half the bottle was gone Hagrid decided to take a risk.

Snape jumped when he felt something wet touch his ear. "What the hell are you doing?" He stood up and glared down at Hagrid.

"I couldn't help myself, Professor. I like you."

Snape's mouth was open and his eyes partially glazed over from the drink. "You like me? I'm not gay."

Hagrid felt his heart plummet. After everything he had done, he was not giving up. "I promise you'll like it, sir." Snape paused and looked carefully at him.

"Why do you like me? Nobody likes me."

Hagrid sighed. He looked away for a second and then met his gaze. "I think you're interesting..and beautiful."

Severus Snape had never been more shocked in his life. Someone thought he was beautiful. He had a chance to have someone, to not be alone. Of course, he enjoyed being alone, but sometimes you just wanted someone to be there for you. Plus, he hadn't been intimate with anyone for about ten years. Hagrid wasn't someone he found attractive, but friction was friction.

Hagrid knew the moment Snape had decided. He reached up to take hold of the man's hands. Hagrid kissed the palm of each hand before pulling him down onto his lap.

Snape was tense and very unsure of what to do in this kind of situation. He liked the way Hagrid was kissing his neck and running his large fingers through his hair. No one ever touched his hair.

Hagrid placed his hands on either side of Snape's face and kissed him. Snape resisted the urge to pull away and start laughing, the man's beard tickled. He sighed as Hagrid attempted to undo his buttons. His fingers were too large to grasp the small buttons so he grabbed the fabric and tore it open.

Severus yelped when his new lover bit down hard on a nipple. He started squirming and attempted not to moan.

Draco Malfoy stopped short when he heard a noise coming from the Head of House's rooms. "Did you guys here that?" Crabbe and Goyle stared at the door to Snape's quarters.

Another load moan with an "Oh yes," greeted them. "Holy shit! That's Snape." Draco glanced around the hallway and placed his ear against the door. "He's got someone in there."

"Please, stop teasing. I need...I want...." Crabbe giggled and stepped closer. "Yes...let me." They could hear what sounded like clothes rustling and Draco scooted over as Goyle crouched down and placed his ear against the door.

All movements stopped and then Draco heard what sounded like someone moving quickly. There was a tumble and then from inside he heard... "Oh sweet Merlin, you want to put that where?"

More muffled noises and then, "There's no way in hell that's happening! That...that....thing...that'll tear me in two!"


End file.
